(“I’m a mouse, duh!”*)
Disclaimer: No, I wasn’t actually a mouse. If you don’t recognise that quote, and the one after this sentence, then your pop culture education is sadly lacking and you should rectify that immediately.
“In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up in costumes and beg for candy. In Girl World, Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it.”*
Much as it pains me to say it, Lindsay Lohan (well, her character) got it right for once. The truth is, I have 0 desire to dress up in a freakishly scary costume where the only part of me you can see is my face. Or my eyes. Maybe not even that.
There’s a saying, “Go hard or go home”, and as girls most of us (not all! some gals are cool with going all out and seriously, kudos to them) prefer to err on the side of caution, rather than transfiguring ourselves beyond all recognition. It is a truth universally acknowledged** that one cannot find a costume that is both attractive and scary, no matter what lies you have been told (and brainwashed into believing) about vampires. Just, no. Sorry hun, it’s one or the other – you can go as a scary vamp or a sexy one, there’s no in-between.
And so most of us go as something decidedly un-scary, because let’s face it – we want to look good. Unfortunately thanks to the dictates of society 90% of looking good is short tight clothes – go figure. Which brings us to the end point (definitely too many chem pracs lately – the first thing I thought just then was “titration!” sigh) – girls dressed as ‘sluts’. Look, this is a controversial issue (as is just about anything these days thanks to ‘political correctness’) so I’ll just go ahead and say it – I don’t understand why some girls wear what basically constitutes underwear out and about, be it on hot days, for Halloween or at nightclubs. (The beach is a different story, friends; everybody is 50% naked so yeah.) Nevertheless, this is just my personal opinion, and I would never inflict it upon others – their lives, none of my biz. Live and let live, yaknow? Everyone has different standards and these just happen to be my own – you do you, ladies, whatever makes you feel comfortable is best!
At any rate, I guess I’m the pot calling the kettle black seeing as my costume this year was decidedly more revealing than I intended (online shopping; should have sized up so it wasn’t quite so short). Whatever. Now, I’m off to feed my sweet tooth (again) – til next time!
P.S. Figures Halloween would be my 13th post, wow. #unintentional #justmyluck
*Mean Girls, a cult classic
**Pride & Prejudice, also a classic (of a different kind)